The Blurtso Chronicles (episodes taken from http://blog.blurtso.com)
“Blurtso gets lost in the corn”
Goodness me! said Blurtso, stepping into Pablo's garden. Look at all these tomatoes! I told Pablo I would pick them while he was gone! And so he set to work, picking the fruit and loading it in crates, picking and loading and picking and loading, until the sun began to set and he delivered the crates to all of Pablo's friends. Whew! thought Blurtso, I’m glad that’s done.
The next morning he went to adm
I wonder how far this goes? thought Blurtso, walking in the corn. I wonder if it goes all the way to Nebraska? I’ve never been to Nebraska. The people in Nebraska must be happy with their corn. I wonder if I should move to Nebraska? I wonder how many cornfields it is from here to Nebraska? Maybe it’s many cornfields away or maybe it’s just one big cornfield. I would be very happy if it’s only a cornfield away. I can hardly wait to get to Nebraska.
……………………………………………………………
This corn is pretty tall, thought Blurtso. Only a giraffe could see over this corn. I wonder if there are many giraffes in Nebraska. I hope so. I would love to see a cornfield full of giraffes. And penguins. I would love to see a cornfield full of giraffes and penguins and maybe even a pterodactyl. Wouldn’t that be something, thought Blurtso, giraffes, penguins, and pterodactyls. I can hardly wait to get to Nebraska.
....................................................
Wow, said Blurtso, I’ve been walking a long time. Nebraska is farther than I thought. I wonder if I’m getting close? I wonder if I already passed it? I wonder if I passed it and am now walking away? I wish I could see above the corn. I haven’t found a single giraffe… I think I’m walking in circles. I wonder if I’m walking in big circles or little circles? If I walk in bigger and bigger circles I should reach the edge of the field. I wonder what’s beyond the cornfield? I wonder if it’s a canefield? A canefield is taller than a cornfield. Even a giraffe wouldn’t walk into a canefield. A giraffe wouldn’t walk into a canefield or a cornfield, apparently. I should have turned back when I didn’t see the giraffes. Yes, that’s what I should have done, I should have followed the giraffes.
………………………………………………………
Hey, what’s this? said Blurtso. An opening in the corn! Oh boy! I can hardly wait to see what’s there! Hmmm, said Blurtso, would you look at that, a wide flat space. An empty space, without a single giraffe. That’s not a good. I wonder what’s beyond this empty space? Probably another field. Blurtso looked at the field from which he had emerged, then looked at the space. I guess if I walk along the edge of the corn I will get to where I went in. Blurtso remembered the vines of his tomato patch and the opening in the corn. I wouldn’t mind a tomato, he thought, I guess I should have saved one for myself. Thinking there might be one last tomato in Pablo's garden, Blurtso walked along the edge of the field. I wonder what the time is? The shadows of the corn are as long as my nose, so it must be before noon. I hope my tomato isn’t shriveled in the sun. I hope there’s some shade from the vines. Maybe my tomato is in the shade. Is Pablo's garden to the east or the west of the corn? I think it’s to the east. That’s why he has so many tomatoes. Oh no! My tomato is shriveled in the sun! Why didn’t Pablo plant to the west or the north or the south?! Hold it… if the time is before noon and my shadow is to the right and I’m walking to Pablo's garden then I must be walking south… his garden is to the south! My tomato is in the shade! Unless I emerged from the corn to the east and I’m walking away from his garden.
……………………………………………..
And so he went, walking and worrying, figuring and fretting, gladdening and saddening, until he eventually reached the garden. Pablo's garden! he cried, tearing through the vines for the last tomato. Nothing… he said, dropping his rump to the ground. I must have picked them all. The sun was at its zenith and the shadow of Blurtso's nose was as long as his nose. I guess that’s that, he said, sitting on the ground. No more tomatoes. And so he sat, surrounded by the vines, watching the shadows stretch, until the sun set and he heard a rustle in the corn…
What’s that?! he said. A giraffe! A penguin! A pterodactyl! Oh my goodness! An enormous boxing-glove nose! Hello, said Pablo, emerging from the corn, I’ve brought a crate of tomatoes, a gift from our friends. A happier donkey in an empty garden the world has never seen. Oh thank you, said Blurtso, and began to eat. When he was finished he laid his head against the crate and let out a sigh. Ahhhhhhhhh, he sighed. I got lost in your garden and couldn't find my way back. Yes, said Pablo, when that happens I just follow the giraffes. Have you ever seen a pterodactyl? asked Blurtso. Of course not, said Pablo, Nebraska is only 6,000 years old.
“Pablo travels parcel post"
Dear Blurtso,
How are your classes at Harvard? Do the professors make fun of your nose? I think I will come for a visit. I have harvested my garden and only the pumpkins remain. What is the best way to get to Harvard? I think I will hitch-hike. I have to be back in a few weeks for my pumpkins. Maybe I should travel parcel post. What do you suggest? I think I will travel parcel post because that will be quicker. I hope you are well. I can hardly wait to see Harvard.
Your friend, Pablo.
P.S. - Tell the cafeteria I’m coming.
“Pablo arrives on time”
Hey, said Blurtso walking out the door, there’s something in my mailbox. Wow! It looks big. I wonder what it is?... I already got the things I ordered… my knife set, my juicer, my infrared sauna, my Tony Robbins tapes. Hmmm, I wonder what it could be…
Pablo! said Blurtso. Blurtso! said Pablo. What are you doing here? said Blurtso. Didn’t you get my letter? said Pablo. What letter? said Blurtso. This letter, said Pablo, pulling a letter from his overalls. I don’t think so, said Blurtso. but I’d better read it to be sure. Let’s see… “Dear Blurtso, I’m coming for a visit…” Great news! said Blurtso. What? said Pablo. Pablo is coming for a visit! Really? said Pablo. Really! said Blurtso. When do I arrive? said Pablo. Today! said Blurtso. Today?! said Pablo. We’d better tell the cafeteria!
“A friend in winter”
The wind is rising, said Pablo. Yes, said Blurtso, the wind of winter. It’s good to have a friend in winter, said Pablo. Yes, said Blurtso, it’s very good.
“Blurtso and Pablo go dashing through the snow”
………………………………………………………
“Pablo and Blurtso hang a few Christmas chains”
............................................................
“Pablo meets Bonny Bray at the New Year’s party”
Hello, said Pablo, my name is Pablo. Hello, said Bonny, my name is Bonny Bray. Bonny Bray, said Pablo. Pablo, said Bonny Bray. Bonny Bray, said Pablo. Pablo, said Bonny Bray.
………………………………………………………………..
“Pablo and Bonny flirt beneath the mistletoe”
There are not many flies at this party, said Pablo. No, said Bonny Bray, there are not many flies. In the summer there are always many flies, said Pablo. Yes, said Bonny Bray, in the summer there are often many flies.
“Pablo and Bonny have a picnic in the Greenhouse”
Welcome to my Greenhouse, said Pablo. Thank you, said Bonny, what are you growing? Everything, said Pablo, wheat grass, bermuda grass, alfalfa grass, wild grass… This must be heaven! said Bonny. Would you like to graze? said Pablo. I’d love to, said Bonny.
“Pablo and Bonny go for tapas”
Do you like tapas? asked Pablo. I love tapas! said Bonny. There’s a bar on
Dígame, said the barkeep. Ración de tortilla y una caña, said Pablo. Y para la señorita? said the barkeep. Lo mismo, said Bonny.
“Pablo and Bonny take a road trip”
Shall we sing? said Pablo. That would be lovely, said Bonny.
But what shall we sing? said Pablo. How about this, said Bonny. “Now the first of December was covered with snow, and so was the Turnpike from Stockridge to
“Bonny and Pablo look at the stars”
It was dark when they arrived and the night was crisp and cold.
You can see the stars, said Pablo. Yes you can, said Bonny. It’s very cold, said Pablo. Yes it is, said Bonny. Would you like to go in? said Pablo. In a minute, said Bonny. Bonny looked at Pablo and Pablo looked at Bonny. Then Bonny looked at the stars, and Pablo looked at the stars too.
“Bonny and Pablo get warm”
Hello Bonny, said the owner of the Inn. Hello, said Bonny. The room you requested is ready. The Barnyard Room? said Bonny. Yes, said the owner, the Barnyard Room.
Mmmmm, said Pablo, snuggling under the covers. Mmmmm, said Bonny, the covers are warm. Will you tell me a bedtime story? said Pablo. A bedtime story? said Bonny. Yes, said Pablo, a bedtime story about two donkeys that snuggle under the covers. Warm covers? said Bonny. Yes, said Pablo, very warm covers.
“Blurtso and Pablo fly south for Spring Break”
Hmmm, thought Blurtso, I guess they ran out of seats in Fist Class.
"Pablo se pierde en el bananal"
Ay qué lío, m'he perdido pues,
ay qué lío, lío lío, m'he perdido pues,
m'he perdido, ay qué lío pues,
ay qué lío, lío lío lío, lío lío lío pues.
Muy buenas burro burrito,
adónde vas tan perdido pues?
Voy a ver a mi amigo,
a mi amigo que es mi amigo pues.
Ay qué lío, m'he perdido pues,
ay qué lío, lío lío, m'he perdido pues,
m'he perdido ay qué lío pues,
ay qué lío, lío lío lío, lío lío lío pues.
Ay burro burrito, ven conmigo,
ven conmigo pues,
vamos a fomentar un momento,
momento de movimiento,
movimiento de momento pues.
Ay qué lío, m'he perdido pues,
ay qué lío, lío lío, m'he perdido pues,
m'he perdido ay qué lío pues,
ay qué lío, lío lío lío, lío lío lío pues.
Amigo Ernesto lo siento sí, lo siento sí sincero,
pero ya me voy ya, ya me voy ya mero mero,
en cuanto encuentre el sendero,
ya me voy, ya mismito ya mero mero.
Adiós burro burrito, vete a encontrar
a tu amigo que es tu amigo,
vete a encontrar a tu amigo pues,
pero vuelve cuando listo estés
a fomentar un momento,
momento de movimiento,
movimiento de momento pues.
Ay qué lío, m'he perdido pues,
ay qué lío, lío lío, m'he perdido pues,
m'he perdido ay qué lío pues,
ay qué lío, lío lío lío, lío lío lío pues.
“Bonny sings a song for Pablo”
“The first time…” sang Bonny, “ever I saw your nose… I thought the sun rose… on your ears… and the moon and the stars… were the crown you placed… on the green… and the tasty fields… my love… on the green… and the tasty fields…”
“The first time… ever I grazed with you… I felt the earth… move beneath my hoofs… like the trembling heart… deep inside of me… and I knew… you could understand… my love… I knew… you could understand…”
“The first time… ever I napped with you… and heard your snore… harmonize with mine… I felt our song… would fill the farms… and bray... ‘til the end of time… my love… and bray… ‘til the end of time… the first time… ever I saw… your nose… your nose… your nose… your nose…”
“To snowboard or to ski”
Hmmm, thought Pablo. To snowboard or to ski, that is the question. Blurtso’s wetcat mctwist is wicked epic, but Bonny is the most beautiful skier I’ve seen… visor beanies are sick, but my Jean Claude Killy is classic… there’s nothing like the glide of sticks, but gapping a blinger is phat nasty… There must be some way to make up my mind… Pablo! called Bonny from the ski shop. Coming! said Pablo, scurrying off to join her.
“Bonny celebrates until the cows come home”
I didn’t know you were Irish, said Pablo. Actually, said Bonny, I’m Irish, Scottish, Welsh, and English. My oldest ancestors arrived in the Isles around 400 B.C. and lived in all the various regions. I used to celebrate Saint Andrew’s Day on November 30th, Saint David’s Day on March 1st, and Saint George’s Day on April 23rd, but now I celebrate them all on Saint Patrick’s Day on March 17th. Does that mean you have to drink four times as much beer? asked Blurtso.
“By yon bonny banks and by yon bonny brays…”
“Pablo and Bonny listen to the rain”
I like to listen to the rain, said Bonny. Yes, said Pablo, and see it on the glass. The drops gathering, growing, and scattering. Yes, said Bonny, gathering and scattering, gathering and scattering. Like the cycle of the stars.
“Pablo writes a poem for Bonny Bray”
A single obsession of light,
a single smile
in the soil of the soul,
a flash in the shadow,
a burning planet,
a single note from the spheres.
A single light illuminating
the water’s crash
at the cliffs of the heart,
a leaping light of statues
erected and razed in the foam,
an undulating light reflecting
the swell and hollow and sway.
A simple light persisting,
in absence,
an extinguished star that continues.
“Bonny and Pablo sip chocolate and talk of the future”
Maybe we should make plans for the future, said Pablo. The future? said Bonny. Yes, said Pablo, what are we going to do? We’ll be together, said Bonny. Yes, said Pablo, but what we will we do? We’ll walk around, said Bonny. And then? said Pablo. Then we’ll eat and drink, said Bonny. And then? said Pablo. Then we’ll sleep, said Bonny. And then? said Pablo. Then we’ll walk around, said Bonny. And then? said Pablo. Then we’ll eat and drink, said Bonny. And then? said Pablo. Then we’ll sleep, said Bonny. And the next day? said Pablo. Yes, said Bonny, and the next day. Wow, said Pablo, that sounds wonderful. Yes, said Bonny, it truly does.
“Bonny and Pablo spend a day with the birds and the bees”
There are many birds and bees out today, said Pablo.
Yes, said Bonny, in the spring there are often many birds and bees.
……………………………………………….
“Pablo and Bonny miss the company of Blurtso”
I miss Blurtso, said Pablo. Yes, said Bonny, first he was in Europe, and now he’s in California. I wish there was something we could do, said Pablo. Hmmm, said Bonny, maybe there is…
“Bonny has a surprise for Pablo”
I’ve got a surprise for you, said Bonny Bray. What is it? said Pablo.
It’s a stuffed animal I bought at the market, said Bonny. Hey, said Pablo, it looks like Blurtso! Do you like him? said Bonny. I love him! said Pablo. What’s his name? said Pablo. I don’t know, said Bonny, maybe we should call him Blurtso. No, said Pablo, if we call him Blurtso we’ll never know if we’re talking about the real Blurtso or the duplicate. Yes, said Bonny, I suppose you’re right. Hmmm, said Pablo, he’s just like the original, but he isn’t the original… what if we call him Ditto? Ditto? said Bonny. Yes, said Pablo, he’s a ditto of the original. I like it, said Bonny, I wonder if he likes it? Why don’t we ask? said Pablo. O.k., said Bonny, I will… hello Ditto, do you like your name?
Yes! Yes! Yes! said Ditto, hopping up and down.
“Ditto wakes up early”
Pablo! Pablo! Pablo! said Ditto. What?! said Pablo. Wake up! Wake up! Wake up! said Ditto. Oh no, thought Pablo, what did I get myself into…?
“Bonny uses Jack Johnson to chastise Pablo for having a busy day”
You hardly even notice, when I try to show you, the song that’s meant to keep you, from doing what you’re supposed to… waking up too early… maybe we can sleep in, pretend like it’s the weekend now… we can pretend it all the time.. pretend that there’s no world outside… there’s no need to go outside… can’t you see… can’t you see…?
“Bonny and Pablo have an idea”
What are you reading? said Bonny. Walden by Henry David Thoreau, said Pablo. What’s it about? said Bonny. It’s about the year Thoreau spend living in a one-room cabin on Walden Pond, said Pablo. That sounds like fun, said Bonny. Yes, it does, said Pablo. Should we do it? said Bonny. Do what? said Pablo. Live in a cabin on Walden Pond, said Bonny. Hmmm, said Pablo, when Blurtso gets back he could watch my Greenhouse…
